Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
