you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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