i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
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