she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
