Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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