I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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