Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
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