i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
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