I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
