I just cut my nipple shaving
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
