Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
