She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
