then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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