My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize