I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize