Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
My balls are so social today.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Floor bacon is actually really good
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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