the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
