office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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