i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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