Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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