Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I didn't notice because vodka
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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