I intend to get homeless drunk
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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