overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
