It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
