Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
