You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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