well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
