i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize