she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
