I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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