There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Randomize
