But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize