My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize
