operation harelip BJ is a go
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Randomize
