John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I think people are normalizing furries
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize