After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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