it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Randomize
