why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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