I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize