i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
