Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Someone shit on the floor
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize