Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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