We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
