physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
