Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
