When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize
