ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
