She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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