What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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