let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
