Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
